SteamCritique
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Horny VillaHorny Villa
All of this games reviews and achievements may be bot-ed but my greatest achievement is getting banned in a pay-to-win single-player porn game with no anti-cheat. The AI devs have a crazy sense of humour
154 votes funny
All of this games reviews and achievements may be bot-ed but my greatest achievement is getting banned in a pay-to-win single-player porn game with no anti-cheat. The AI devs have a crazy sense of humour
154 votes funny
9/10 goon session 8 strokes 16 min prep time and 2 min goon session had to play it a bit so i could unlock a few baddies but still a good game
61 votes funny
At first you're kinda forced to merge butt plugs and dildos together, but as the game progresses, your main focus starts to shift toward reaching the endgame content of the fast food and tools merge section. I put in a few hours but haven't touched this game since writing this review.
61 votes funny
Honestly being single and using this game has fulfilled my destiny. i have quit my bad habits and have started taking up long walks on the beach while using my steam deck to play this game. My addiction to the P Hub sites have been cured i no longer need to spend money on cam girls. 10/10 would recommend!!!!!!!!!!!!!
60 votes funny
i have lost well over 200 dollars in diamonds and buys, and levels and girls it keeps reseting to a lower setting, and all my "buys" have disappeared, this is the 2nd time this has happen, i am getting royally peeved
47 votes funny
Our son was only 14 when he was diagnosed with Lukemia. The journey was long, filled with treatments, surgeries, and countless nights where we watched him battle not just the disease, but the overwhelming fear and loneliness that came with it. But there was one thing that brought him back to life in those dark moments: Horny Villa. He found it during one of his hospital stays, and at first, it was just something to pass the time. But soon, it became more. As he played, he would tell us about his missions—how his toys worked together, how they fought back against impossible odds. We saw him light up with excitement, a spark of joy we hadn’t seen in a long time. The game gave him a sense of purpose, a chance to be a hero, even when he couldn’t be one in his own life. For hours, he’d immerse himself in his glue, and for a while, the pain seemed to fade. Sadly, he lost his battle. But those moments, those hours spent with Horny Villa, were some of the happiest of his final months. We know that, for him, it wasn’t just a game. It was a source of strength. A way to feel like he was in control when so much of his life had been taken from him. To the creators of Horny Villa and its developers at GreenT: Thank you. You gave our gooner son a little piece of light when everything else felt so heavy. You gave him a way to feel like he could fight back, and for that, we are forever grateful.
46 votes funny
Oh no, you're out of ingame energy and can't play. Oh, my goodness, what can we do? Hey, no worries! You can totally restore it with diamonds. Oh, you don't have any diamonds? Oh my goodness, you are so lucky! You can buy a bunch for just a few tens of real dollars. It's just like Gardenscapes and other mobile gaming trash. But with tits.
36 votes funny
The whole game is AI slop, from images to the writing. It's actually awful. Add together the constant popups to sell "boosts" and it becomes clear that it's a zero effort game to try and lure in people to spend money cause "SEXY PIX!!!!" Update: It's still the most predatory, low effort game in the universe, It's still awful. You can see me as gaming jesus , I take the punishment so you don't have to. Now I just want to see if it's possible to 100% achievements as F2P or if it's possible at all.
24 votes funny
the game is good, my sock has already turned into stone, a little more and there will be more protein than fabric, so to speak, working hard is always a pleasure
19 votes funny
You don't get to **** any of the girls and the game aggressively attempts to drain your wallet. Your better off blowing your money on lottery tickets or h00kers.
18 votes funny
While the game is not horrible it is extremly pay to win, and has constant bugs, the devs do not use the community hub to interact with thew player base and events are lack luster with no real main story updates since release on Steam. I cannot recommend a game in this state.
15 votes funny
Everyone has large boobs. As a lover of small boobs, I cannot recommend this game.
13 votes funny
Yo guys I need help fast how I hide a game from showing in Family Share
12 votes funny
Looks nice but it "energy" gates you so that you can't progress without paying real money and a lot of it. Insane cash grab probably hoping to take advantage of teenage boys with their parent's credit cards.
12 votes funny
I am blind and at the very beginning it seemed to me that these were all different cucumbers, eggplants and similar vegetables. It is unclear why all the farmers were women and why they were all naked. Then I put on my glasses and realized what kind of farm they had.
12 votes funny
fun game dont care to much for the anime naked ladies but its mindless fun to kill some time after work
11 votes funny
Honestly, I like the the high quality pictures (just pictures, no scenes or anything else notable, don't play if you're looking for anything else) this game has to offer, and the gameplay is simple yet addicting, however, that's where the good ends. I have never seen such a greedy company in all my years of gaming. Not a single micro transaction is below $4.99 USD, that wasn't necessarily so bad at first. HOWEVER, for me the straw that broke the proverbial back, was when I learned the subscription benefits are bugged! Specifically, there is a weekly and monthly "subscription" which already overpriced, don't function as intended. The weekly is ok, but don't buy more than one week at once, or you miss a free summon. And the monthly feature is bugged, it gives you an energy cap of 200, which is nice, cause this is a hentai game and who the hell can log in and use the energy points every four hours? BUT IT DOESN'T WORK LIKE THAT. You will absolutely not accrue energy points past 100 IF YOU ARE NOT LOGGED IN. So now i have to keep this game open and minimized, which isn't even offered by the game itself, have to hit ALT + Enter to do that, and I'm sure you can see why that would be an issue. I wish I knew this or read reviews before I spent a significant sum of money on this game, but I can assure you, I will not spend another dollar on this greedy publisher. I have a hard time believing the issue on one of their primary services, namely the 200 energy cap, is not an intentional way for them to milk another penny out of their customers. There are better alternatives, don't start here.
11 votes funny
at the villa! where the assistants at? cocky want boing-boing!
11 votes funny
You unlock a maid and she doesn't even clean this crack den. What a hole
11 votes funny
A garbage game, typical of mobile games to get your money and AI-generated images.
9 votes funny
In the Villa straight jorknin it... and by IT... well lets just say... my Peanitst
9 votes funny
Energy is the best way to filter players. The ones that are bothered might buy, but most will abandon your game. With that said: Congrats, morons.
9 votes funny
My good sir i did find this exquisit and i found this game very entertaining, thank you to the developer as my wife doesnt love me anymore i have found a new means to happines- M'lady 🎩
9 votes funny
I had to play this game after reading negative review of sucker spending 200$ on this free to play game. Wow. What a hot garbage. After 20min of playtime i had 1 to 2 hour wait time timers. Also i have never seen so many popups to buy some currency. After every task there is a popup to buy something to speed up things, i guess. Artworks are nice, but animations are basic and nothing impressive.
9 votes funny
There are a few moments in life that split everything into “before” and “after.” For most, it’s something big: falling in love, losing someone, seeing the ocean for the first time. For me? It was Horny Villa. I don’t remember what I expected when I first launched it. A distraction, maybe. A weekend time-killer. Another game to load, play, and shelve like so many others. But within minutes—no, seconds—I knew something was different. Not because of what it showed me, but because of what it awakened in me. Somewhere between the first flicker of light and the soft fade into its world, I felt a shift. The kind you only recognize in hindsight. The kind you can’t explain to other people without sounding ridiculous. And yet, here I am trying. Horny Villa didn’t just look beautiful. It was beauty. It didn’t tell me how to feel; it reminded me that I could feel. That I was feeling. And that maybe I had been numb for far longer than I’d realized. I was going through a rough time when I found it. One of those quiet storms—no explosions, no disasters, just the slow erosion of color from everyday life. Waking up felt like a chore. Conversations felt like echoes. Even things I loved began to feel distant, like they were happening to someone else. I wouldn’t have said I was unhappy, but I wouldn’t have said I was anything. I was just there. And then Horny Villa happened. The visuals—my God. They weren’t just graphics. They were reminders. Of light. Of motion. Of grace in unexpected places. There was a sky in that game, one I kept returning to again and again. I couldn’t tell you what color it was exactly—somewhere between violet and gold, maybe—but it felt like watching forgiveness unfold. I would just stand there, not moving, letting the light wrap around my screen and somehow reach into me. It felt like I was being witnessed. Like the game knew what I needed even when I didn’t. I started going for walks again, trying to find reflections of that digital sky in puddles and windows. I noticed leaves more. I noticed the way sunlight threads through curtains. I bought a plant. I named it. I started writing again. Not because I had something to say, but because Horny Villa made me believe I still had a voice worth hearing. There was no cathartic finale. No tear-stained moment where everything changed overnight. Just small things. A deep breath I didn’t rush. A song I listened to all the way through. The decision to open the window instead of pulling the blinds. People laugh when I say a game changed my life. They think I’m exaggerating. And maybe I am, a little. But when I think about who I was before Horny Villa, and who I am now—I see more than a difference. I see a reawakening. So no, I can’t tell you what Horny Villa is about. But I can tell you what it did. It reminded me of wonder. Of softness. Of being alive in a world that still has the capacity to surprise. And that’s more than enough.
8 votes funny

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