Hours played: 9 ⏰ (bandmates called an intervention. I told them I’m busy smashing frost trolls and Odin’s feelings 🥶⚡) Bought this on PC because my PS5 sounded like a Boeing 747 having an existential crisis 🛫💥 and smelled like burnt plastic and bad decisions 🔥💀. Now I’m running it at 144fps 🖥️⚡, ray tracing so real I apologized to a frost troll 🥶 before I obliterated him into pixel soup 💀🪓. On PS5: “cinematic experience” 🎬 On PC: “Nordic fever dream 🌌 where I can see Thor’s pores 👃⚡, Kratos’ veins throbbing like he’s angry at life 🩸💪, and Odin’s eyebrows judging me 👁️😳.” Ultra textures so sharp 🖼️ I: Learned Kratos’ skincare routine 🧴 Discovered Odin has bad posture 🐦 Accidentally gave Baldur a hug 🤗💀 (he was not prepared) Game made me: Grow a beard overnight 🧔🌳 Name my fridge “BOY” 🥶 Throw my axe at the mailbox 📬🪓 (RIP mailman. Did not respawn 💀) Consider starting a Viking cult in my backyard 🏡⚡ Pros: ✅ Runs smoother than Loki’s snake oil 🐍✨ Graphics so sharp I cut myself just looking at Baldur 🩸👀 Mods coming that make Atreus do your taxes 🧾📈… and maybe yell at your mum too 😳💥 Feels like I am actually Kratos. Minus the PTSD, maybe. Cons: ❌ Beard now has its own zip code 🧔🌍 GPU demands human sacrifices ⚡️🔥💀 (I gave it a cat, it was satisfied… for now) HOA still won’t let me duel Thor in the parking lot 🏢⚡ (Karen energy 100) Crying frost trolls haunt my dreams 🥶💤 Verdict: 💯💥 10/10 — Odin can’t hide from my RTX 3080ti 💻⚡, Thor can’t punch hard enough 🥊⚡, and I now worship my fridge 🥶🙏. Play this on PC and prepare for: Chaos 🌌🪓 Beards growing faster than AI learning curves 🧔⚡ Atreus giving unsolicited life advice 😳💥 If you play on PS5… you’re missing 144fps of pure Nordic insanity. Get on PC or get out, mortals ⚡💀.