SteamCritique
Quiz
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ANEURISM IVANEURISM IV
I was walking down the street and watched 2 guys beating each other with pipes. A cultist came out of the sewers and stabbed both of them, looked at me and chased me all the way to my apartment. Then I got on my computer and played ANEURISM IV
149 votes funny
I was walking down the street and watched 2 guys beating each other with pipes. A cultist came out of the sewers and stabbed both of them, looked at me and chased me all the way to my apartment. Then I got on my computer and played ANEURISM IV
149 votes funny
I watched a man get brutally murdered in the middle of the street. I wept over his corpse and called for help and a cop came over and accused me of killing him before beating me and arresting me. A bit too realistic for me
95 votes funny
>Hop on my least favorite american server >The Rot is Consuming >End up in metalworks with a group of proles and doctors >One slave was working off his karmic debt when the gates blew open >Now he's ours >We get him shitfaced drunk and have him huff and ingest all the narcotics in our collective inventories >Doctor and I make jars, decide we're gonna have him huff jenkem for all eternity >Gather a massive crowd of proles and cortex units ready to watch this slave eat shit >The gathering begins to get cultish >We offer him meat, bystanders offer more drugs, the banker who owns the nightclub bathroom we holed up in even gives free drinks to the slave >The slave begins saying cryptically positive things. >"CONSUME" >"FEED" >We start to praise him like an otherworldly being, and he responds in kind by beginning some sort of insane glue-sniffing gospel >He's like our ET, and those RotHead bastards are the government, trying to take him away >Start referring to him as "my son" and "my boy" >Zealot tries to take him but the room erupts into a cacophony of belted cries >"HE WANTS TO EAT SHIT" >"He's happy :)" >"DON'T TAKE HIM FROM US" >The Zealot leaves to get backup, we hold up with a guard >Cortex_Approved_Shithuffing.mp4 >The zealots arrive, kill everyone. I hide in a bathroom stall. >They stare at me as they aim down sights at my head >My last request is that they take the jars of fermented fecal funny with them, as to make sure he has a good life >They let me say goodbye >The slave speaks to me before they riddle me with bullets >"I WILL ALWAYS HAVE YOU IN MY HEART" >murdered in a bathroom stall with a jar of Jenkem meant for my son in between my legs 10/10, haven't had this much fun since stealing printers in darkrp.
84 votes funny
Befriended a lonely man addicted to glue, became addicted to glue myself. Man in a black coat approaches us and offers us glue for killing each other, my "friend" instantly smashes my skull. 10/10 game
71 votes funny
i buy cigarettes and leave them on the floor in random places so that someone takes them and gets addicted. i dont do it to boost cigarette sales or anything im just doing it for the love of the game
67 votes funny
After a long day of work mining resources out in the wasteland and processing the raw materials into axles and parts for the prosperity of ANEURISM IV, I found myself roaming the city and looting through trash as any good prole does. This is when I heard someone attempting to get my attention. Turning around I spied a pair of ne'er-do-wells beckoning me over to a dark alleyway, green lighters in-hand. Deciding I had nothing better to do, I stashed a few items save for my trusty pocket rat and a bandage, and went over to meet with them. They offered myself and a fellow prole membership in their club and we decided to see what it was about. A short jaunt through poorly lit tunnels, stairwells and various locked, underground passageways later and we arrive at the antler-headed pair's destination: A pit. They begin to explain to the both of us proles how they need to kill and consume our flesh, and then toss our bodies in the pit below. Deciding that this was a sub-optimal way to continue living, I begin explaining that I can be of use to them, I even have items (the rat and bandage) with which to trade with. My companion has other ideas, however. He immediately sets about pleading for his miserable life, desperately trying to say he has a lot of fat on him, and isn't very healthy. An interesting tactic, to be sure, but the antler-heads didn't seem convinced and before I could even get to bartering my pocket rat away for my life, they begin to hack down the fat prole until he lay in a slump on the ground. The pair do not stop there, however, and openly consume his flesh, then toss his bones in the pit. This doesn't phase me, though, and they make a new offer: I help them lure more souls down here to meet the same fate, and I get to live and be consecrated into their cult. Of course, I agree to this arrangement. Beyond simply getting to live, I am interested in what they believe. They tell me the Cortex is evil and that the Rot, in fact, is the only thing worth living for. The only thing that will free the city. So we set about returning to the surface. I manage to convince another prole to come with us into the depths, again offering membership in the cult to him. He is slightly misguided and thinks he's joining the KKK (not sure what that is, to be honest) but we lead him anyways. Once at the pit the antlered-one yet again explains to this new victim how he's going to be cut down, eaten and tossed into the pit. This doesn't seem to sit well with the chap however and he simply tosses himself into the pit before the Mr. Antlers can finish his monologue. It's then that all Hell breaks loose: My vision goes blood red, nay-- the whole world goes blood red. Immediately I'm led out of the sacrificial chambers and told to hide. Already I can hear the gunshots, I can see proles running in fear for their lives. I'm told we've all been limited and the whole city has begun a purge. As I flee through the streets, I can see the mangled corpses of fellow workers, medics, Cortex agents, and cultists alike strewn about. These are truly the end times. I scribble these last thoughts down in the hopes that someone will not make the mistakes I did. TL;DR: Tried to join a club, started the apocalypse. Oops.
30 votes funny
Be a liquidator, minding my business at the local civil center just as a new ration cycle is announced. Be the first one inside, ready to get my slop. Some prole walks in standing a little to close to the ration vendor as its vending my hard earned meal "Mind if I steal this ration, thanks...". I turn around, take out my flamethrower, and reduce him to a pile of burning ash right then and there in the civil center. Take my hard earned ration, then proceed to drag his smoldering corpse to the nearest infirmary to throw him in the incinerator... [b]You have been rewarded one Anamnecyte.
23 votes funny
some of the best emergent storytelling potential i've seen in a game in a long time. i literally exposed a bank trust and caused a revolution by being an honest banker. i set my deposit fees lower than anyone else on the server, and the rest of the bankers tried to get me to raise my fees to a ridiculously high amount they had all collectively agreed on. instead of cooperating, i ran around telling all the proles that the other bankers were colluding to jack up deposit fees so that they would bank with me instead. this lead to the proles rising up and killing the bankers who were price gouging deposit fees, which completely overwhelmed the police. 10/10.
19 votes funny
Genuinely fills a void in the multiplayer RP market and I'm enjoying it a ton. Here's some experiences I had on launch day: -> Become hard working metal worker, toil all day in mines -> Become thirsty, go towards vending machine. Funny vent man sells me silver bar for cheap, I buy to sell for more later at other funny vent man. -> Drink refreshing state-made soda -> Get searched by cop and summarily executed for having contraband (silver bar) in front of the vending machine. -> Next life, war is declared on kidneystan. Rush to war factory for good pay and serve great Cortex by making bombs. Server pop is at 50 so it is utter chaos as everyone is running around with parts and stabbing bombs with screwdrivers. We make good money. -> Zealot Rebels do ritual that causes purge event (no laws enforced) ... The war factory that is packed full of people so it becomes a complete blood bath. Small group comprised of myself and other faktory workers hide in laundromat. First we hide inside washing machines. -> One of them goes "man fuck this, I'm doing laundry" and then we all proceed to peacefully work at the laundromat while the streets are literally being painted in blood and gore from zealots outside. We all survive somehow as they ignore us. -> I buy can of food from shady alley man, try to go to apartment to cook it. Run into shootout between rebels and cops. I hide in an alcove next to a conscript. He just types "I'm cooked, fr fr." and fucking dies in front of me. I take some of his stuff and just walk through the shootout towards my apartment. "I just wanna cook my beans, man, don't shoot me." The rebels let me pass. -> Another glorious day living under the Cortex
18 votes funny
Recent changes to the game have made it disrespectful towards player time. It can take multiple hours to get certain roles now as a prole only to get two shot by scum. It's also pushed the balance towards scum rotting the server so the continuity that used to happen between play sessions is pretty much dead. If you have time to no life it, the game can be fun, but right now the juice ain't worth the squeeze. The game has real potential if they balance the amount of grind you have to do to have fun, but as someone who can't play for 4+ hours at a time, it's now an extremely limited gameplay experience.
11 votes funny
The game is cool but players just sit around as cops and just shoot you if they feel like it because no one wants to become the enemy nor are there any rules/punishments to stop them from shooting innocent people. They can also search your inventory for contraband (which they do literally all the time because they have nothing better to do), and if they find something they will shoot you immediate. They will literally leave contraband on the ground so you will pick it up and shoot you on sight. Compared to cops, the cultists only spawn with knifes and you're forced to craft your own gun to stand a chance which is very time consuming. Would be really cool if y'all added bases where you can do several illegal things like cook meth or smft and have cop raids and such just like darkrp. And also buff the cultists cause else there's no point
11 votes funny
🚨🚨🚨HAPPY BANKER DAY to all my CAPITALISM🗽loving hoes💦👅👅👅looks like BANKER💰🤮finally got caught👩‍✈️👨‍✈️trying to call daddy CAPITRON 3000 so now we need to RIDE🏇CORTEX 🏛raw😩😩👅👅 so they can’t take it away, send this to🔟of your💃🏻wokest📝PROLES🔥🍌or say 👋BYE to ur RATIONS🙏🏻😩eating that CIGARETTE SOUP is the only️ ethical👌form of consumption😋😋😋under late capitalism💸💵💴💶so WE’RE ALL EATING TODAY🍆🔥💦👅
10 votes funny
ANEURISM IV is less a game and more a digital sewage plant clogged with incel Redditors, Mongoloids, and unmedicated Neo-Nazi weirdoes roleplaying the collapse of society, because let’s be real, it’s the only way these degenerates feel they could thrive: In a failed society. Every interaction feels like a group therapy session for toilet goblins who just want to commit the worst acts possible. And the Lisps… the amount of people with speech impediments is repulsive. This game just feels like a gathering of emotionally stunted “Forever Virgins” trying to out-misery each other in a sandbox built entirely out of Nazi Germany Fetishization. What a PIECE OF CRAP. Please pass on this toilet game. You’re welcome in advance.
9 votes funny
this is trumps america
9 votes funny
Until there is some form of moderation within this game I cannot in good conscious recommend anyone play this especially if you're female. I was given this game by my friend who thought the game was fun and wanted to teach me how to play. He is a guy and after the one night I tried to play this game with him, informed me that he has never had the kinds of issues that we had. For the entirety of trying to play on the only two servers that had more than 10 people and a playable ping level I was followed by 4-5 individuals of various roles in the game and incessantly called slurs and killed every time I attempted to do anything, even just walking around. I heard Nazi's talking about their supremacy and all that racist crap, and a variety of clips being played over the voice chat system. While there is a mute function it is extremely hard to reach if the individual is moving around a lot and does not change the constant murder issue. They only targeted me, another girl on voice chat who was playing a doctor at the time trying to help me, and the person who was trying to teach me how to play the game because I was using the voice chat and was not a dude as they didn't bother anyone else and no one helped any of us with this for the entirety of the experience of this game. There is 0 moderation of the in game voice chats at this time and the game was unplayable and unenjoyable to the point that if it was not a gift I would have refunded it until a moderation system is in place. Once there is one I'll give the game another shot and potentially take this down but until then I cant play the game again.
9 votes funny
i spent one day's worth of grocery money on this terrible game and i can't stop thinking about it, i've made too many mistakes in life, maybe it's just time for me to end it all
9 votes funny
reminds me of baltimore but with russians instead of blacks
7 votes funny
This game isn't for you! You won't like it You will look back upon your time spent on it and hate it. If you hate space station 13 you'll under stand the same feeling for this game once you try it! Amazing , Awful game. Do (Not) Play it.
7 votes funny
ANEURISM IV is the best poverty simulator on the market. Get stabbed fighting over a pile of dirty laundry Descend into madness Commit crimes Commit justice (a crime) Drink the water Get pregnant Say thanks for an unsolicited and forceful blood transfusion Die in the war It's a good time.
7 votes funny
amazing. stranger asked if i wanted to do a ration robbery with him. i said yeah. then proceeded to take me to the ration center to rob me of my rations.
7 votes funny
Offered to sell someone cigarettes, he threatened to stab me and steal them so I beat him over the head with a lead pipe.
7 votes funny
-walked into an alleyway -theres another guy -he says to me "dont go down there" -i ask why -from the other end of the alley some guy runs up to us -starts swinging a knife -i die -respawn -find a laundromat -me and two other guys start washing, drying, folding clothes -i seriously have no idea what im doing -some future soldier, cop dude walks in -he says "we need bombs" -all three of us stare at him in silence -soldier dude says "follow me" -we all follow him -led to some bomb manufacturing warehouse -people everywhere -running back and forth -shouting -dragging items to tables -gangs of men with screwdrivers building bombs -one guy that looks like a surgeon is screaming orders in a robot voice -tells me to get to work quickly -i am so fucking confused -build bombs with like twenty other guys for about 10 minutes -just as i begin to figure out what im doing a timer finishes and everyone cheers -ok -a city announcement says that rations are available for pick up -didnt know i had to eat -get completely lost in this labyrinth of a town -walk down a staircase thats absolutely pitch black -dead end -walk back up -theres a guy with a flamethrower burning huge fleshy lumps in the street -he says "dont mind me i have schizophrenia" -?? -continues burning fleshy lumps i seriously dont know what the fuck this game is
7 votes funny
! The game is going WOKE ! Reading the game's description: No Rules, Only Consequences In ANEURISM IV, there are no rules dictating your actions. This is no longer true! In the new moderation system, you can get banned, not only for offensive communication, but also for purely in-game actions such as trapping people. I bought this game for the "anarchy" that it advertised, which was in stark contrast to the tiresome admin abuse and arbitrary rules that plagued DarkRP. The game is getting rid of this anarchy aspect, and as such I cannot recommend it to people like myself.
6 votes funny
They turned gmod DarkRP into a game with living servers driven by conflict and made it beautiful and strange and hilarious and I'm in love. Where else can I try and run a bank at 0% exchange rates in the name of some made up God and get a hit put out on me by a 4 banker large established banker's union? That shit just happens naturally because the game is set up to be this almost perfect push and pull of conflict of interest between 60 different players.
6 votes funny
You will not enjoy your time and you will like it this game may improve down the road but Racism is common on official servers
6 votes funny

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